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Sunday, March 22, 2009


My heart and mind are at war,
mind keep manipulating things,
heart keep nullifying them,
this war is tearing my heart down,
and I still want my heart to win.


Monday, March 2, 2009

..Last touch..!!


My hands touched her hands last time and my eyes drenched with endless tears.I turned my face away from her and moved away with that touch into the huge crowd at the railway station.I felt so empty as if my soul freezed with her last touch.I wanted to run back steps and hold her tightly,I wanted time to stop there,I wanted to live those moments forever.I wanted scream and scold God for making me stand at this stage of life.But,I failed b'coz I knew nothing can stop this.I have to face anyhow.With blurred vision as heavy step I came back to the place where I left my luggage.I wanted to cry loudly but somehow I had to hold them .I sat on my bedding facing my back from my batchmates who were standing their and let my tears to fall.I was always scared of this day.Once I was scared to step foot on this place and now I am scared to leave this place.How come this strange place become so attached I don't know.Actully it was not this place but the beautiful memories which I treasured here made me attached to this place.My beautiful spicy moments of four years of my graduation.I was afraid to leave my friends who made these moments.Tears kept on rolling ,it was the most difficult moments.I look at my hands that holded the last touch of my friend,Ananya.Bending my head down I started crying endlessly.All past moments started flashing through my eyes.Right from my first step to the last with the blend of all laughter,fights,tears.Suddenly in between these flashes I saw somebody forwarding a hankerchief in front of my face."You can take this I have washed today only".I moved my head and looked with my moist eyes to Omi and this sweet gesture of him brought a tinge of smile admist a peck of tears.It felt like someone kept a warm hand on my sinking heart.I was bit relaxed to see him sitting infront of me with the pristine smile and his smile made me realise that I still had one friend left to walk few steps with me.Whistle of the train distracted my series of thoughts and I got up to carry my luggage.The trains stops there only for five minutes,so everybody started running to catch train.As we had a lot of luggage we all picked up our luggage fastly and threw it at the entrance door of boggie and then entered the door stepping on beddings.As there was so much rush inside so we sat at that entrance door only.It was not that we could not have got space to sit inside but we all were so emotionally drenched that we prefered to be away from crowds and be with our lonliness.As I sat on the bedding train began to move.I felt sudden pang inside my heart.My eyes instantly moved towards the entrance door to see that place last time.But I couldn't ,I saw Omi standing there obstructing my view.He stood there as train slowly started moving away from that place.I could see his back only but could feel the emotional fight he must be going through.I shouted,"Hey,come here".He turned back with his pale face.My heart craved for an unanswered question Why are men not allowed to cry?I said,"You are crying?".He replied in the pale voice,"U didn't let me cry" and I realised it's not only me who is facing this separation.So,the journey of four years ended here.Four year of a life out of home,of making best pals,of scoring less scores,of ultimate pleasure.It took four years to make friends and just a second to loose them.It's not that they will never be my friends anymore but they will never be so close anymore.As the train started accelerating my every single moment started moving backward and my path started turning to the future which was unpredictable.The future which is still to be lived.How far I will carry ahead this tinge of separation I don't know but I know one thing whenever I will turn back to this day,a drop of tear will fall from my eyes.

P.s. Last day of my college,those tears are still wet,which do sometimes fall from my eyes when I look back at my beautiful journey.I miss you all n I love you all...

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